unhappy

I was young but I wasn't naive. I watched helpless as he turned around to leave and still I have the pain I have to carry. A past so deep that even i could not bury if i tried.

This is over my head. But underneath my feet cause by tomorrow morning, I'll have this thing beat and everything will be back to the way that it was. (if only) I wish that it was just that easy cause I'm waiting for tonight. Been waiting for tomorrow. I'm somewhere in between what is real just a dream what is real just a dream what is real just a dream. Would you catch me if I fall out of what I fell in? Don't be surprised if I collapse down at your feet again I don't want to run away from this I know that I just don't need this cause I cannot stand still I can't be this unsturdy. This cannot be happening.

I really need to move on , reallly. But how do i move on? I really dont know, i only know i cant stay this way anymore. It's killing me , hurting me so deeply. Fuck fuck fuck fucking fuck. It's the past and i'm still living in it , what's wrong with me man?!! i needa move on , i'm missing most of my life. I know it's hard, it's passing by. Memories be out all night, to reminisce wont bring me back. Just look ahead and hold on tight. He's falling forward with no signs of slow and moving faster. Thats not that I wanted. I jus wanted me to be jus like him now. Can't help but think of the times I've had with you, pictures and some memories will have to help me through.

p/s:Happy freeman though. You must be in cloud nine now.
p/ss: But i wasnt th one you share your happiness with.